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September 10, 2011
Gone Corporate: Escape Dreams
 
When you’re a former-and-wannabe agency hack stuck in Corporate World(R)(TM)(SM), often your thoughts drift away from unchallenging projects and jerks who play office politics.
 
Some folks fantasize about the latest auto-tuned cutie on MTV. Some start going through their lunch options, because that hour away from the cubicle is more precious to them than The One Ring was to Gollum.
 
And some of us dream of escape.
 
In my case, escape will come in one of three forms:
 
#1: Yet another layoff. Despite ongoing success, my employer has let about a dozen people go over the past few months. And as my faithful readers know, the big big boss is “a former copywriter” who may or may not appreciate my skills. Remember, I’m replaceable — because anyone can write. Right?
 
If I did get laid off (which would be thrice in four years — that’s gotta be a record for someone who generally stays sober on the job), it would be tough financially, but it would definitely light a fire under me to skip ahead to #3 below.
 
#2: A new job. This is a long, long, long shot. I’ve been at a couple local agencies, but the chances are way slim that one of the more established agencies takes a chance on me with my outdated portfolio. (I have nothing in there from the past few years — I’m not proud of most of the actual work I’ve done for a variety of reasons. ‘Specially since it’s mostly crap direct mail letters or “marcom” writing.)
 
And another corporate gig? Let’s just say that’s not something I’m seeking.
 
#3: My own agency. This is not a dream, actually. It’s a reality that I’m going to bring about in my life. Not to get all personal-development-y on you, but I’ve decided on a couple universal truths:
           
A) There are two ways to make lots of money: Play the corporate game or run your own business.
B) There is only one way to control your job security: Be your own boss.
 
I can’t wait to do this, but I’m holding on to the corporate gig as long as possible so we can get on solid financial footing and so my wife can follow her professional dream first. (I also can’t wait for her to start kicking butt.)
 
In the meantime, I will drive my painfully slow hour to a dull job with unchallenging projects and annoying “clients.” Because whether it’s in 2011, 2012, or 2013 (January latest), I know that I’m going to turn the dream into reality.
 
P.S.: Find out about “Escape Velocity” and a lot more about personal development, social media, and other cool stuff by checking out the works of Chris Brogan. (Google him, he’s everywhere.)

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After a year of creative incarceration in Corporate World, your beloved Corporate Hack finally distracted the guards, outran the bloodhounds and scaled the wall to make his escape. Now that he’s back where he belongs in Ad World, he’s re-branded himself as The Inside Man...but he’s still having Ad-Verse Reactions. 
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