You dated a dinosaur. You romanced a pigeon. Now it's time to pursue the Colonel. I Love You, Colonel Sanders! A Finger Lickin' Good Dating Simulator has appeared on gaming site Steam and, yeah, we're not making this up.
It has a trailer video, stills and a premise that places you as a culinary school student trying to date your classmate Colonel Sanders. KFC's founder and mascot looks simultaneously old and young as a buff, androgynous, prematurely gray hipster who definitely would be willing to try KFC's new plant-based nuggets.
The game promises hours of play-through, secret recipes and "life-changing decisions" that will have "real consequences with real animated characters' feelings at stake."
Our biggest question: Really?! The game description answers this: "Officially created by KFC. No, really." I called the KFC media hotline and left a message just in case. I heard back from KFC with, "Yes, it is true." The game is free and will be available starting Sept. 24.
This anime Colonel is a far cry from the fried chicken empire's other recent incarnations of the man: the soft, comical Sean Astin version and the apparently official Halloween costume.
KFC isn't afraid to pull strange marketing stunts involving RoboCop, Cheetos or fried-chicken sunscreen, so the release of a Steam dating sim would be just another day in the brand's PR department.