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Is This Why PR Types are Called 'Such Boobs'?
By: Shawn Paul Wood
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"Would you just look at them...such boobs!" 

Taken out of context, you would think I was hanging out in some seedy club with black lights, '80s hair band music, and some graveled-voice emcee shouting, "Gentlemen, the wonderful Jazzz-mine." But nope. That comment came from a lovely woman — borderline saintly, had it not been for the eff bombs I heard hurled in my direction as a child. 

Yes, that's my mom. 

Naturally, as a testosterone-enriched young man, a comment like that was bound to have me prairie-dogging to find the picture to which she was referring. Welp, much to my surprise, she was watching a bunch of white guys. In suits. Talking politics. Yeah, that presidential debate more than a decade ago was quite the letdown. It did, however, bring up an interesting discussion. 

First, why did you confuse me like that? Second, what makes them...those?! Lastly, seriously? 

After my mother stopped snort laughing, she explained the antiquated term for dolts was used because "no one in America can trust the words that come out of their mouths because their PR people put those words there first." She had a point, which brings us to this coincidental story. 

TMZ (who else) was the first to break the story
about Christina Hendricks, her hacked iPhone, naughty pictures. And oh yeah, her boobs. Christina's "rep" told TMZ that the Mad Men star's phone was "indeed hacked recently...and multiple self-shots were stolen including Hendricks barely dressed, without makeup, presumably at home."

However, the one NSFW picture that is floating on the Intertube bares it — or them — all. Yet, said rep claims that is not Christina. It's an impostor. According to GossipCop.com: 

Christina's phone was in fact hacked and photos were stolen. The proper authorities have been contacted in hopes of rectifying this situation. The topless image is fake and not an image of Christina. 

Now while the "hacking" is unfortunate and anyone who takes birthday suit shots on their smartphone is anything but...I believe there's a surreptitious issue afoot that is not being reported. For the cynical, catch on with me... March 25 is the long-awaited Season 5 of... yeah, "Mad Men." And guess who stars in the AMC hit show? Jessica Rabbit herself — Christina Hendricks. 

Granted, I don't have access to the Web traffic to AMC's website, but I would be willing to bet it's getting as many hits as Google is for "Hendricks - iPhone - pictures." You think anyone at that network is upset about the PR boost the show is getting? How many times do you think "Mad Men" has been typed into a search bar in the past two days? Publicity hit? Strategic? Nah! Why do you ask? And you think the momentum could last three weeks? It may, for two important reasons. But I'm sure this iPhone kerfuffle had absolutely nothing to do with ratings. Maybe a call from Hugh Hefner, but not at all about ratings. 

"Would you just look at them. Such boobs." Yes, mother. I understand now. 

   

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About the Author
Shawn Paul Wood is a hack-turned-flack with more than 20 years of collective journalism, copywriting and marketing communications experience. Shawn Paul is founder of Woodworks Communications in Dallas, Texas. If you need him, ping him here or follow him on Twitter @ShawnPaulWood
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